Yesterday was the Kentucky Derby...well, it was supposed to be the Derby but that didn't happen. Instead, some genius created a program, designed an algorithm, and televised a horse race that was noteworthy on many levels. For one thing, it was virtual. For another, it took 13 Triple Crown Winners in history and pitted them against each other in a horse race that was both fascinating and exciting. It was ingenious how they could do that. I wanted to ask questions and wished that they had a chatbox on our TV like they do on our Zoom calls. How could they do this to the viewing audience?! I wanted to know, 'What if Seattle Slew had veered left? Would Secretariat have still won the race?' I also wanted to know, 'What if it had been raining? Would that have changed the results?' 'How did they choose which horse race to use from each of the horses?' I had so many questions and no one to ask.
Skip got up from his spot in front of the TV and fixed me another bourbon cocktail. We had to rough it because there was no mint for a Mint Julep so we were drinking sweetened bourbon with orange and cherry. Mmm. Not bad. (See what I mean about ingenuity?) On our second round of cocktails, he announced that there was a turtle race being run and sponsored by Old Forester. "Sure! I'll drink to that!" I told him. The race was rather amusing but not so much as Skip's commentary. He was hungry for sports. He had gone too long without live sporting events and now, faced with a turtle race his attention turned to each of the entries. He commented and analyzed, sipped his drink while studying the attributes of each turtle and noted their names by repeating them to me as he often does when we watch other sporting events to help involve me. I sighed and nibbled my cocktail peanuts feigning interest. The trumpet sounded heralding the beginning of the race. (It was the actual Derby bugler) and then the announcer (the real Derby announcer) introduced each of the turtles. The field of seven was populated by the likes of Seattle Slow, Green Mamba, Galapa-Go, What the Turtleneck, Rocket to Nowhere, Steve, and American Tortuga. All were ready at their post.
3-2-1, out of the gate, and they were off.
No.
They weren't.
These shelled reptiles chose to build the tension a bit longer. Their 2 minutes of fame stretched into 3 minutes without anyone making a move. Then, suddenly one of the turtles, I think that it was Galapa-Go decided that it was his chance to score viewer fans by moving out of the circle. With slow-motion, he turned away from the others and began his slow journey to the finish line. But wait, the excitement was only just beginning. Some of the others chose to turn and race as well. "And they're off!" yelled the announcer. I can't say that we watched with rapt attention but it held our interest enough as the potential winner, Galapa-Go decided the last minute to turn away from the finish line thus leaving it open for another, What the Turtleneck to challenge him at the last minute. I turned to get more ice for my drink and perhaps missed some of the finer nuances of the race, but ultimately witnessed the historic nail-biting finish as one determined turtle stuck his neck out and crossed the finish line. Since 1945, the last time this race was run, the new winner, What the Turtleneck had achieved a first place victory to the cheers of the announcer, of Skip, and no doubt thousands...nay millions of hungry racing enthusiasts to earn his place in history.
And so the sun set on another day of the Covid-19 isolation. But on this day, I learned that some things...some traditions will not be stifled by a virus. Mankind finds a way to rise above the challenges with which he is faced. He not only perseveres but through creativity, he excels.
Fun-Factor Score: Man - 1, Covid - 0 .
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